Maximize Your Influence

How to Command Attention with Power and Authority 

Great persuaders know and understand how to use different forms of power, but if you're like most people, you just cringed at the word "power." Is power something we're really allowed to talk about? Is it good or bad? Can we have power over our audience?

Check out the article here.

The answers to these questions depend on what form of power it is, how it is used, and what the user's intentions are. We all possess different forms of power in different situations. It is human nature to respect and follow power and expertise, and power certainly has legitimate, ethical, and necessary uses. Of course, we know that power can also be used unethically to manipulate and control

Power is different from force. It is all about your intent. Power creates trust, it strengthens, and it empowers. Force must always be maintained, enforced, and warranted. Force sucks the energy and life out of people. True power encourages, revitalizes, and creates unity and synergy. Power causes us to listen and obey. Force causes us to be skeptical and run.

David R. Hawkins said it best: "Power gives life and energy—force takes these away. We notice that power is associated with compassion and makes us feel positively about ourselves. Force is associated with judgment and makes us feel poorly about ourselves."

Have you gotten your FREE book yet?

Direct download: Podcast_219_-_The_Forgotten_Power.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 6:30am CDT

I was asked an interesting question last week on a radio interview.  I was asked, “How can you resist or repel an unwanted persuasive attempt?”  He also asked, “How can you stop someone that always tends to manipulate you?”

I discuss this article here, and the persuasion ninja of the week.

On this podcast, I talk about ways to resist another person’s unethical persuasive attempt.  This is good to know for you as a person and as a persuader.  As a person, this information will help you resist unwanted persuasive attempts.  As a persuader, you will begin to see some of this resistance or behavior in your prospects and will need to adjust your presentation.  So how do you resist persuasion or even manipulation?

 

Offer of the week

Direct download: Podcast_218_-_How_to_Resist_Persuasion_and_Manipulation.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 6:30am CDT

On this episode Kurt interviews Dave Kurlan. They discuss the biggest mistake that sales people make, baseball and sales, biggest mindset obstacles, self-limiting beliefs and how to reprogram your beliefs, how to get your prospect to pay more attention to you than to your competition, the sales process, good closing techniques, how to create urgency early, how to get past a "slump," how to know whether or not your prospect is qualified, and how to deal with resistance.

Dave Kurlan is a Sales Development Expert and a top rated speaker, and the best-selling author of Baseline Selling – How to Become a Sales Superstar by Using What You Already Know about the Game of Baseball. He hosts Meet the Sales Experts, a weekly radio show and is the leading expert in Sales Assessments and Sales Force Evaluations. He is a contributing author, along with Deepak Chopra, Brian Tracy and Jack Canfield, to the new book, Stepping Stones, and a contributing author, along with Jeffrey Gitomer and Zig Ziglar, to the new book, Mastering the World of Selling. He has published more than 800 articles on his popular sales management Blog, Understanding the Sales Force. He is the founder and CEO of Objective Management Group, and Kurlan & Associates, both Inc 5000 companies.

For more information about Dave and his work visit his site here.

Direct download: Podcast_217_-_Dave_Kurlan__Baseline_Selling.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 6:30am CDT

One of the Bricks - Fear of Rejection

We all experience rejection in small doses every day. But what about when we persuade for a living? Rejection seems to take a higher toll. We avoid rejection like the plague, but it affects your income. Running away from the rejection solves nothing. Letting our fears overtake us and paralyze us also solves nothing. Ironically, whether we run or succumb, neither option helps the situation.

Fear of rejection can also affect the bottom line by inhibiting you from getting out there and approaching people in the first place. If you are so incapacitated by fears of rejection that you retreat from attempting persuasion at all, then you have sealed your own fate.

So we can hate and fear rejection all we want, but it's still going to happen. What do great persuaders do about this? How do great persuaders respond so that their fear of rejection doesn't paralyze them and affect their performance?

The first thing to keep in mind is that even if your audience ultimately concludes that your product or service is not the right fit, they are not rejecting you personally. We generally understand this concept on a superficial level, but I ask you to give it some thought and really let it sink in. Do not allow yourself to feel inferior, embarrassed, or depressed based on somebody else's opinion.

The ability to bounce back after being faced with rejection on any scale is critical in the persuasion world. Great persuaders have the ability to erase the negativity from their minds at will and move on with a clean slate in a matter of minutes. This tendency is worth noting considering the fact that most of us hang on to negativity and use it to nurse our wounds or make excuses for weeks, months, and sometimes even years.

Another way to hasten your rebound from rejection is to realize that your worst fears are probably not even realistic. Suppose a sweet deal slipped through your fingers. No matter what you said or did, the client's words were final. In other words, you were rejected. Is your life really over?

Does your audience now hate your guts? Are they going to smear your good name and come after your family in a mad rage? Are they going to spray-paint the office with slanderous, hurtful remarks? Of course not. The truth is, it just wasn't a good fit. They'll have forgotten about it in a matter of minutes or hours, and you should too.

Offer: FREE BOOK

Direct download: Podcast_216_-_The_Brick_Wall_of_Resistance_Part_2.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 6:30am CDT

The Hostile Prospect

This person disagrees with you and may even actively work against you. For a hostile prospect, use these techniques:

·         Find common beliefs and establish a common ground.

·         Use appropriate humor to break the ice.

·         Don’t start the presentation with an attack on their position.

·         You are only trying to persuade on one point; don’t talk about   anything else that could trigger disagreement.

·         Because of your differences, they will question your credibility.    Increase your credibility with studies from experts or anything that will support your claim.

·         They will try to find reasons to not like you; don’t give them any.

·         Don’t tell them you are going to try to persuade them.

·         Express that you are looking for a win-win outcome rather than a win-lose situation.

·         Show them you’ve done your homework.

·         Respect their feelings, values, and integrity.

·         Use logical reasoning as clearly and as carefully as possible.

·         Use the Law of Connectivity and the Law of Balance.

Deal of the week: FREE BOOK

Direct download: Podcast_215_-_Dealing_with_Rude_Mean_and_Hostile_People.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 6:30am CDT

On this episode Kurt discusses the geeky article of the biggest causes of anxiety. Article here. He also discusses the blunder of the week that happened to him at a burger joint in Southern California. And why first impressions really are important. He also discusses the brick wall of resistance and how we sometimes create it.

Has this ever happened to you? You enter a retail store and you're approached by a sharply dressed persuader. You are interested in buying, but the salesperson is a little aggressive. You get an alarming feeling in the pit of your stomach and then do what many of your customers do to you. You lie!

You say, "I'm just looking; I'll come backlater," or "It's too expensive," or "I have to talk to my spouse before I decide." What you're really thinking is "I don't like this guy," or "I don't trust her," or "Something didn't feel quite right." In the end, you never go back to this store, you never recommend it, and neither the store owner nor the persuader ever knows why.

This obstacle is truly a silent persuasion killer. Most people will never say anything to you to alert you to the fact they are feeling this way. They are more comfortable lying to you—so they don't hurt your feelings. They walk away and simply never deal with you again. The reason this obstacle is such a killer is because we don't even realize we're doing it.

 What do you do to overcome this tendency? Your persuasion attempts must be nonthreatening and very natural. Forget loud and flashy. That strategy only encourages resistance. And most definitely forget about high pressure. Not only does that solidify the wall of resistance in that particular moment, but the wall will increase in size. When people feel they have been pressured, bullied, or coerced into buying or doing something they don't need or want, they are resentful. They will never do business with you again.

 The moment people sense that you are attempting to persuade them, the brick wall increases in size and strength, and they will resist you. To counter this tendency, persuasion and sales must take place below the conscious radar.

 Great persuaders have cultivated a sixth sense when it comes to the "push and pull" aspect of persuasion. You must encourage without pushing. Entice, but don't ensnare. You have to sense and then predict, based upon knowledge, instinct, experience, and nonverbal cues, what you can do and how your audience will respond. With this sensitivity, which you can learn, there won't be any smacking head first into the brick wall of resistance.

Offer of the week: lawsofinfluence.com 

Direct download: Podcast_214_-_The_Brick_Wall_of_Resistance_Part_1.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 6:30am CDT

Join Kurt as he interviews Kristin Zhivago. Kristin is president of Zhivago Partners, a digital marketing management company, and the author of the book, Roadmap to Revenue: How to Sell the Way Your Customers Want to Buy. Kristin was one of the first to identify selling as a matter of supporting the customer's buying process.

Kristen and Kurt discuss:

  • Biggest blunder people make today in sales & influence
  • Tips for entrepreneurs
  • How to think like a buyer
  • How to deal with a prospect who has found wrong information or too much information from the internet
  • How to not bore your prospects
  • What questions to ask to get your customers to buy
  • Current trends in online marketing

And much more!

Content Marketing: How to go from Creep to Friend

Why do they need or want what you’re selling? It is never, ever what you assume. Interviewing thousands of customers for my clients convinced me of that by the second interview. What roadblocks must be overcome, in their own minds, before they can reach for their wallet? Who do they have to convince? What else have they looked at, and why did they reject it (so far)? What makes them nervous about buying from you, because of their past experiences and because of the things you said – or didn’t say – on your website? What is the question they wish everyone would answer, but no one does?

All of us marketers can easily suffer from a problem that is similar to the one salespeople have. Most salespeople listen only closely enough so that they can talk. In other words, their goal is to talk, not to listen. They listen so they can talk. Similarly, marketers gather facts about their customers so they can prove to their bosses that they “get” those customers, and so they can write. They are more excited about the output than the input, just like salespeople, and just like the graph above makes clear.

For more information about Kristin visit: zhivagopartners.com

Offer of the week:

Find our your Persuasion IQ & get a free digital copy of my best-selling book! www.takeyouriq.com 

 


On this episode Kurt discusses the blunder and ninja of the day, and the psychology of waiting and whether or not is a good or bad thing and if it affects your ability to persuade.

Atmosphere can also include the tension in the air. Is there a rush, or are customers relaxed? What type of climate are you trying to create? Do you want a quick, fast decision, or do you want your customers to feel comfortable enough to stay for a while?

An interesting study on what happens when you create an atmosphere of being rushed can be seen in the following example:

Princeton University psychologists John Darley and Daniel Batson wanted to see how students would respond if they were in a situation replicating the biblical account of the Good Samaritan.  As the story goes, a band of thieves beat, robbed, and left a man traveling alone by the roadside to die. A devout priest and a reputable Levite passed by.

 Neither of the men stopped to help the dying man. Finally, a Samaritan, stopped to help him. The Samaritan bound up his wounds, took him to an inn, and even paid the innkeeper to care for him until he returned.

Darley and Batson asked seminarians on a one-on-one basis to prepare and present a short speech on an assigned biblical topic. The test was set up so that on their way to the location where they would deliver their speech, each student would cross a man slumped over, coughing and groaning.

Which students would actually stop and help? Before preparing their speeches, the students filled out a questionnaire asking why they had chosen to study theology. Then a variety of speech topics were assigned, including the story of the Good Samaritan. As the students were leaving to deliver their speeches, some were told, "You'd better hurry. They were expecting you about three minutes ago." Others were told, "They won't be ready for a few minutes, but you may as well head over now."

Now, most people would assume that seminarians stating on their questionnaires that they had chosen to study theology so they could help people and who were then assigned to speak on the Good Samaritan would be the ones most likely to stop and help the ailing man on their way. Interestingly, neither of those two factors seemed to make much of a difference.

In fact, Darley and Batson stated, "Indeed, on several occasions, a seminary student going to give his talk on the parable of the Good Samaritan literally stepped over the victim as he hurried on his way." The element that seemed to be most influential was whether or not the student was rushed.

Of the students who were told they were already a little late, only 10 percent stopped to help. Of the students who were told they had a little bit more time, 63 percent stopped to help.

We can learn from this example that we can create atmospheres where people are so involved that they ignore other factors they normally would not ignore.  On the flip side, if participants are too relaxed than they become difficult to persuade.

Free Book Offer: Lawsofinfluence.com

Direct download: Podcast_212_-__Psychology_of_Making_Your_Prospects_Wait.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 6:30am CDT

Join Kurt as he interviews Travis Truett, the CEO of Ambition, the first sales performance management platform built for the modern workforce thats currently endorsed by Google, Harvard Business Review and more.

On this episode they discuss the most common persuasion blunders, how to get in your prospects shoes, biggest changes in the sales & influence world, how to persuade millennials (check out this article), gamification and when it can backfire, why people buy and more!

4 Ways to Inspire Your Millennial Workforce

#1. Encourage Them Regularly Along with Feedback

This group responds well to reinforcement and finds great value by being noticed and receiving recognition for their efforts. Young adults within the workforce are also striving for leadership positions than before. Giving them an impression of being important is likely to make them feel contended and stay with their employers longer because they see the potential for growth. 

#2. Offer Millennials Personal Time Along with Flexibility

Millennial’s are particular about having a work-life balance to which they give extra importance. Companies and management that can offer flexible schedules will improve their chances for procuring millennial talent. 

#3. Help Millennials Connect to the Business

Organizations and companies are often making mistakes by failing to explain their vision to their employees. Companies are advised not to overlook explaining their values because it helps employees to connect to the overall vision of the employer. Millennial’s have a tendency to look out for methods where they can make a difference and if they are interested in the vision of the employer it will be just the ignition they need to perform better. 

#4. Create New Titles Along with Steps In Between

The best ways to inspire your millennial workforce is to create new titles because of their commitment to further their careers. Millennial's do not prefer waiting for a lengthy period of time for promotions. This is not an indicator for companies to be giving out rewards without reason but considering smaller incentives, as a bonus for a job completed efficiently will be significant. The objective must be to keep the Millennial’s understand they are on the right path.

Offer of the week: Lawsofinfluence.com

For more information about Travis and his work visit ambition.com

 


The Theory of Cognitive Dissonance

Leon Festinger formulated the cognitive dissonance theory at Stanford University. He asserted, "When attitudes or beliefs conflict with our actions, we are uncomfortable and motivated to try to change." Festinger's theory sets the foundation for the Law of Dissonance.

The Law of Dissonance proves that people will naturally act in a manner that is consistent with their cognitions. What is a cognition?  Our cognitions is a mental process that uses thoughts, beliefs, experiences, and past perceptions. 

Basically that means when people behave in a manner that is inconsistent with these cognitions, (beliefs, thoughts or values) they find themselves in a state of discomfort. In this uncomfortable state, they will be motivated to adjust their behaviors or beliefs to regain mental and emotional balance. When our beliefs, attitudes, and actions mesh, we feel congruent.

When they don't, we feel dissonance at some level—that is, we feel awkward, uncomfortable, upset, or nervous. In order to eliminate or reduce that tension, we will do everything possible to adjust our beliefs or rationalize our behavior, even if it means doing something we don't want to do.  

Imagine that there is a big rubber band inside of you. When dissonance is present, the rubber band begins to stretch. As long as the dissonance exists, the band stretches tighter and tighter. You've got to take action before it reaches a breaking point and snaps.

The motivation to reduce the tension is what causes us to change; we will do everything in our power to get back in mental balance. We like to feel a level of consistency in our day to day actions and interactions.  This harmony is the glue that holds everything together and helps us cope with the world and all the decisions we have to make.

The human brain needs to be right. It is hard for us to admit we are wrong.  We are programmed to justify what we are doing is right and avoid taking responsibilities when things go wrong. It is easier for us to find ways to prove ourselves right (even when we are wrong) then to admit why we are wrong. 

 Even when backed into a corner or shown evidence that proves we are wrong, we tend to not change our reasoning or point of view.  We will find reasons, proof, or social support why what we did was OK. We will start to believe our lies to ourselves, it couldn’t be our fault and we persuade ourselves why we were justified.

Find all past podcast episodes with a free membership at www.influenceuniversity.com

Get your free book at www.lawsofinfluence.com

Direct download: Podcast_210_-_Double_Dissonance_-_Get_People_To_Persuade_Themselves.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 6:30am CDT

Join us on this great interview with Dr. Ben Voyer.  We are going to talk about:

How persuasion has changed

Biggest persuasion blunder

Loss avoidance

Power and relationships

Influential nature of stories

Professor Voyer is Loreal Professor of Creativity Marketing ESCP Europe, and visiting fellow London School of Economics. Professor Voyer is a behavioural scientist that has investigated how self-perception and interpersonal relations affect cognition. He has authored & co-authored more than 150 scientific contributions to the field of applied psychology. He has appeared on CNBC, CNN, The Washington Post, The Economist, BBC, Financial Times, BusinessWeek and The Economist. 

Direct download: Podcast_209_-_behavioral_science_behavioral.mp3
Category:Marketing -- posted at: 6:30am CDT

Objection Obstacles

All excuses and objections can be boiled down one or more of these seven potential objections:

Once you understand that all objections stem from one or more of these seven key areas, you will have a much easier time identifying the root of your audience's discomfort. You will then be able to address their objections in a professional, caring, and non-threatening way. Many persuaders (without realizing it) show tension, uneasiness, or irritation when someone brings up an objection. Usually this unrealized conduct occurs because objection stirs up the persuader's own insecurities (often fear of failure or fear of rejection). The persuader thinks to him or herself, Didn't I go over that already? I'm doing a good job explaining things! Why is this person still not convinced? Why am I bombing this persuasive encounter? Do I sound like an idiot?” As understandable as this reaction is, it will only makes things worse. Your audience will sense your uneasiness and feel even more uncomfortable. Don't set off more alarm bells than are already ringing!

Direct download: Podcast_208_-_True_Objection_or_Knee_Jerk_Response.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 6:30am CDT

Blueprint to Business is the ultimate guide to becoming a successful entrepreneur. Bestselling author and CEO Mike Alden puts aside the rainbows and sunshine, gets real about what it takes to 'make it,' and gives you the real-world guidance you need to hear. Through anecdotes and advice, he shares his experiences along with those of other top founders and entrepreneurs to give you a realistic picture of what it takes to build a business. It's a bit of tough love, a healthy dose of reality, and a tremendously motivating guide to striking out on your own; from motivation and commitment to business licenses and the IRS, this guide is your personal handbook for the biggest adventure of your career.

 So you want to start a business: how much are you willing to commit in terms of time, money, and energy? How do you plan to bring in customers? What will set you apart from the crowd? What will convince clients to come to you rather than your competitor with an established track record? These questions must be answered before you even begin planning—and then, you have to make that canyon-sized leap from planning to doing. This book guides you through the early stages with practical advice from a real-world perspective.

For more information about Mike and his work visit: thealdenreport.com

Direct download: Podcast_207_-_Blueprint_to_Business_Success.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 6:00am CDT

Inside the World of Objections and Concerns

 When you become a great persuader, you will view objections differently than most people do. You will even welcome objections and enjoy handling them. Why? You will realize that when people voice objections, it indicates that they are both mentally interested and emotionally involved in whatever it is you are proposing, even if they are skeptical.

 Interested and involved—what more could a persuader want from their audience? It may be surprising, but when there are no objections during the persuasion process, the persuader's success rate actually drops dramatically.  It is much better to get objections out in the open than to let them fester.

 Top persuaders do not consider objections or audience concerns as opposition. Rather, they view them as part of the persuasion game. Your audience will naturally delay as long as possible the moment of decision—the moment they need to say yes or no. This stalling can be used to your benefit. Dialogue and exchange of ideas can create a long-term follower, client, or customer.

 Great persuaders may even solve objections before they are voiced. No matter how good you get, objections will be raised, and the truth is that well-handled objections help you persuade. Your persuasiveness depends a lot on how you handle objections and concerns, and you can handle them best if you know what the most common objections are. There are thousands of excuses.   

 Many persuaders (without realizing it) show tension, uneasiness, or irritation when someone brings up an objection. Usually, this unrealized conduct occurs because objection stirs up the persuader's own insecurities (often fear of failure or fear of rejection).

 The persuader thinks to him or herself, “Didn't I go over that already? I'm doing a good job explaining things! Why is this person still not convinced? Why am I bombing this persuasive encounter? Do I sound like an idiot?” As understandable as this reaction is, it will only makes things worse. Your audience will sense your uneasiness and feel even more uncomfortable. Don't set off more alarm bells than are already ringing!

 A calm, natural demeanor opens the door to persuasion and will keep it open in the face of objections. Remember: your audience cannot feel at ease if you don't. They cannot feel relaxed if you aren't. They won't be enthusiastic if you aren't showing enthusiasm yourself. In a very real way, you must create what you want them to feel.

These oxytocin genes may influence number of friends

You may be as friendly as your genes

 

Direct download: Podcast_206_-_Do_Closing_Skills_Still_Work.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 6:00am CDT

Charisma is influence.  In other words, getting others to do what you want them to do and like doing it.  People get uneasy when you talk about influence, but just like power, it is neutral.  Some feel it can’t be learned, others get uneasy that it might get misused and some pretend it is not that important.   Charisma and influence go hand in hand.  It can be used with your leadership, your company, your children and even for making the world a better place.  Influence can get people to accept your ideas, brings people together and helps change stick.  I am not talking about selling skills.  I am talking about long-term sustainable change that people want to implement.  There is a direct correlation between your ability to influence, your charisma and your income.

The challenge is most people influence the wrong way.  You tend to influence how you like to be influence and that is completely wrong.  You need to adapt to the person and to the situation.  Most influence happens with subconscious triggers (see the subconscious section).  Everything you do, everything you say or how you make them feel will affect how your audience feels about you.  You are repelling people and you don't even know it. When people sense a hint of force, deception, hype, or selling underlying any of your influence attempts, you will lose your charisma.

Audiences are tough.  People have built a lot of resistance to the old style of persuading and influence; many people have built a brick wall of resistance even before you've even meet them.  What can you do to overcome this tendency?  Your influence attempts must be nonthreatening and natural.  Forget loud and flashy.  That strategy only encourages more resistance.  And most definitely forget about high pressure.  Not only does that solidify resistance, it closes the door to influence.  When people feel they have been pressured, bullied, or coerced into doing something they don't need or want, they become rebellious and resentful.

The Benefits of Laughter

Direct download: Podcast_205_-_What_If_The_Competition_Has_The_Same_Price.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 6:00am CDT

Negotiation: Face-to-Face, by Phone or via E-mail

In our age of ever-expanding communication possibilities, researchers have been drawn to answer the question of which communication mode is most likely to lend itself to successful negotiation. Their answer? It depends.

 Face-to-face communication is more likely to alleviate any possibility of miscommunication or deception. When you’re actually there, in person, you are more apt to pick up all the nuances of the exchange. That way, you will be better able to gauge what the other party is thinking and to determine the direction in which the negotiating is headed.

For the same reasons, it is also easier to create and maintain rapport. If there is already a fair amount of tension in the air, however, negotiating by phone can take the edge off, can provide breathing room and can minimize the effectiveness of any pressure tactics that may have been employed. E-mail’s main advantage is that both parties have control over saying exactly what they want to say and how they want to say it.

 Since there is no ebb and flow to live conversation, the involved parties can keep the floor as long as they want. On the flip side, e-mailing can tend to make the negotiating parties less restrained and more impulsive in their communication. This rashness isn’t always a bad thing, but it definitely can be if tensions exist. One study found that abrupt and unmannerly exchanges occurred 102 times when negotiating via e-mail as opposed to only 12 times when negotiating face-to-face.  

Influence University

 

Direct download: Podcast_204_-_Negotiation_Blunder_-_Postition_vs_Problem.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 6:00am CDT

Reduce to the Ridiculousness (JND): This technique involves paring down your request to something that seems manageable, easier to comprehend or easier to monetize. Let's say you are trying to convince someone to purchase a life insurance policy. The client wants a $250,000 policy and you feel that is not high enough for his needs. To adequately take care of his family, you suggest a $500,000 policy. His perception is that the monthly payment for a $500,000 policy is too high. So you break it down for him, telling him that for an extra 50 cents a day, or the cost of a can of soda, he can insure himself and adequately take care of his family if something were to happen to him. With this contrast, your client can see that the extra 50 cents is worth it to have the extra $250,000 in coverage. You have reframed your request into simple terms to help your prospect see it fitting into his way of life. If you are getting resistance from coworkers to participate in a new project, you could say we are only looking for your help for 10 minutes a day or 45 minutes a week.

 Many times, we can fly under the radar with the contrast principle. There is a theory called the "Just Noticeable Difference" (JND),  which means the minimum amount of difference in the intensity of the stimulus that can be detected. That means the minimal amount of change the brain can handle before it begins to notice.  What does this mean? How much can you raise the price of a product without anyone noticing? This is also true for taste. Companies want the best taste for the lowest cost. The quality of the ingredients causes people to notice or not notice the quality of the product.

 Many marketers would rather change the packaging and offer less of their product than resort to charging more. When we don't notice the difference, we think we are getting the same deal. Watching a sunset would be below the JND.  We really can’t see the sun move down the horizon as we watch it. When you raise the price of a product, you don’t want anyone to notice. Gas prices going up another ten cents is not noticed unless it breaks the dollar threshold i.e. $4.00-$5.00.  Is the yogurt cup now 2.9 ounces or 3 ounces?  We don’t notice especially since the cup size has not changed, but the bottom of the cup is more concave.   

3 Negotiation Techniques from Harvard Business Review

 

REVISED OFFER


"Door-in-the-face" is one of the most common techniques for implementing the Law of Contrast. Basically, an initially large and almost unreasonable request is made, likely to be declined—hence the "door slammed-in-the-face" as the prospect rejects the proposal. Then a second smaller and more reasonable request is made. People accept the second request more readily than if they'd just been asked outright because the contrast between the two requests makes the second one seems so much better. The technique is effective because social standards state each concession must be exchanged with another concession. When you allow a rejection, it is considered a concession. The person you are persuading will then feel obligated to agree with your smaller request.  The reason DITF is so effective is because society and the Law of Obligation direct us that each concession must be given a concession.  When you give them a concession they will be more inclined to give you a concession.

Demonstrating this point, researchers first asked college students to donate blood every two months for three consecutive years. Requiring a long-term commitment of not only time, but also of physical and emotional responsibility, the request was overwhelmingly turned down. The next day, the same students were asked to donate blood just one time, 49 percent agreed. The control group, where the students were only approached with the second request, (will you donate today) only demonstrated a 31 percent compliance rate.

The main reason the door-in-the-face technique is so effective is because the contrast between the two requests makes your prospects feel like they are getting more/or less than if you didn’t adjust their perceptions. They feel like they've made a fair compromise, while you get exactly what you wanted in the first place. 

Article: Smelling your food makes you fat

OFFER:http://healthepain.com/


Never fight on price.  Price in not the issue – you are the issue.  Only 6% of things are bought on price. Anybody can fight on price.  Let’s learn 14 techniques to make price a non-issue.

 "Price is what you pay. Value is what you get."  Warren Buffett

 This is all about human perception. The human mind has to find a benchmark or comparison to make judgments, especially when we are talking about unfamiliar situations or new products. People need to make comparisons with their past experience and knowledge. 

The brain will always attempt to contrast your product or service. Is it the best or worst, cheapest or most expensive? Is your product the safe or risky choice or is it familiar or strange?

By presenting your prospects with contrast, you are creating those comparisons for them. The mind can't process everything at once and so it develops shortcuts to help make decisions. Instead of making a completely internal judgment, we look for boundaries, patterns, and polar opposites. 

We want to know the difference between our options, so we naturally contrast the two items. We mentally create a value or price in our mind from highest to lowest.

Do you want your prospects to compare your product or service to a second-hand used car or to a Rolls Royce? You get to decide where you want them to start their benchmark.

 

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Verbal Packaging & The Leverage of Language

The more skillful a person is in the use of language, the more persuasive they will be. People are persuaded by us based on the words we use. Words affect our perceptions, our attitudes, our beliefs, and our emotions. The words we use in the persuasion process make all the difference in the world. Language used incorrectly will trigger the wrong response and decrease your ability to persuade.

Word skills are also directly related to earning power. Successful people all share a common ability to use language in ways that evoke vivid thoughts, feelings, and actions in their audiences.  Carl Jung revealed that all words are full of symbols and each symbol triggers an emotional reaction or feeling.  All words have emotional meanings that are different than their definitions in the dictionary.  Understanding words and their emotional triggers will enhance your ability to persuade and influence.

Word Choice  ---

Article link: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/news/scary-real-in-flight-announcements/

Understand that proper language varies from setting to setting, and from event to event. One word choice does not work in every circumstance or culture. Word choice can also be critical to defusing situations or in getting people to accept your point of view. Even one word can make the difference between rejection and acceptance. In a study by social psychologist Harold Kelley, students were given a list of qualities describing a guest speaker they were about to hear. Each student read from either one of the following two lists:   

  1. Cold, industrious, critical, practical, and determined
  2. Warm, industrious, critical, practical, and determined

Of course, the students who read #1 had less than positive feelings about the speaker. The interesting thing, though, is that the lists are exactly the same except for the first word! They found that the first word at the front of the list conditioned how the student felt in reading through the rest of the list. It didn't matter that none of the following words were negative. Just reading the word "cold" tainted how the students read the rest of the list.

As I mentioned the airline industry has mastered the power of words. They know word choice is critical to getting their point across and to reduce stress. In one situation, a flight attendant had run out of steak as an option for dinner entrée. Instead of telling the customers their only option was chicken, the flight attendant said, "You can have a piece of marinated chicken breast, sautéed in mushrooms in a light cream sauce, or a piece of beef." Consequently, people chose the chicken because it sounded better. Think about the words next time you read a restaurant menu.

 

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WHAT YOU WILL GET: 18 MP3 Audios, Manual & Application Guide

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Magnetic Persuasion Audio Boot Camp (18 MP3’s)
Next, we have Magnetic Persuasion Audio Boot Camp.  The easiest way to double your income is to double your persuasion skills.  Remember when you need to persuade someone, it is too late to learn.  Magnetic Persuasion is literally the difference between knowing what you want– and getting it, anytime, anyplace, from anybody. Create unimaginable wealth, transform your career, and strengthen your relationships. Magnetic Persuasion Audio Boot camp is the first and only resource to combine scientific research and documented studies into one comprehensive catalog of proven persuasion, influence, and motivation techniques.

  • Never be told “I can’t afford it again”
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  • How to create huge value to eliminate price resistance
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The Magnetic Persuasion Manual has every piece of the persuasion pie. This manual is packed with over 15 years of scientific research and over 100 persuasion and influence tools. This includes over 344 pages packed with cutting edge research and application. You will learn about inoculation, Zeigarnik Effect, and advanced association triggers. You will also learn how color, touch, and smell affect every aspect of persuasion.

  • Know exactly what the person you want to persuade is thinking and feeling.
  • How to have absolute confidence in what you’re saying
  • Overcome objections before they are even brought up!
  • RESIST persuasion so you don’t fall into unethical traps!
  • Harness the 18 most powerful words and put them to use

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Next is the Magnetic Persuasion application guide. This will crystallize the use of Magnetic Persuasion. This comprehensive guide will help you implement the following:

  • The 12 Laws of Persuasion
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  • How to get the yes, when they say no.
  • Things you are saying, projecting and doing that repel your prospect
  • The Pre Persuasion Checklist

Magnetic Persuasion is one of the most incredible courses I’ve ever released.

This program will give you a distinct advantage over your competition.

As you learn these skills you will Master your life and increase your income. You will learn skills known only by the ultra-prosperous. You will learn and master a new skill everyday for a full year. Every situation, you’ll feel in control. You’ll know exactly what to say and do. So invest in yourself and your future.

You will not learn the old tired tactics of the Ben Franklin close or the ol bait and switch. You will learn how to influence the mind of your prospects, persuade them to join your business. Think with me, what would this be worth to you?

As you study Magnetic Persuasion you will discover advanced psychological techniques that will expand your mind.

You can Experience the Power of this!

Imagine being able to overcome objections before they happen, Know what your prospect is thinking and feeling, feel more confident in your ability to persuade. Be the master of your destiny, and control your financial future.

Invest in your future, invest in your income, and be proactive about who you are and what you want to become. Everything you want in life, somebody else has and you need to know how to persuade to get it.

Imagine where you would be now, if you had Mastered these skills only a few short years ago. How many millions of dollars have you lost?  Remember when you need to persuade someone, it is too late to learn.

Direct download: Podcast_200_-_Word_That_Kill_Persuasion_And_Words_That_Influence.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 5:30am CDT

Robin Dreeke FBI Interview

Did you ever leave an interaction saying to yourself, "That could have gone better?"

Do you want to improve your leadership, interviewing, sales, and trust building skills for every aspect of your life?

A counter-intelligence expert shows readers how to use trust to achieve anything in business and in life.

Robin Dreeke is a 28-year veteran of federal service, including the United States Naval Academy, United States Marine Corps. He served most recently as a senior agent in the FBI, with 20 years of experience. He was, until recently, the head of the Counterintelligence Behavioral Analysis Program, where his primary mission was to thwart the efforts of foreign spies, and to recruit American spies. His core approach in this mission was to inspire reasonable, well-founded trust among people who could provide valuable information.

The Code of Trust is based on the system Dreeke devised, tested, and implemented during years of field work at the highest levels of national security. Applying his system first to himself, he rose up through federal law enforcement, and then taught his system to law enforcement and military officials throughout the country, and later to private sector clients.

Inspiring trust is not a trick, nor is it an arcane art. It’s an important, character-building endeavor that requires only a sincere desire to be helpful and sensitive, and the ambition to be more successful at work and at home. The Code of Trust is based on 5 simple principles:

1) Suspend Your Ego

2) Be Nonjudgmental

3) Honor Reason

4) Validate Others

5) Be Generous

For more information on Robin Dreeke and The Code of Trust visit www.Peopleformula.com

Direct download: Podcast_199_-_How_Create_Trust_in_Strangers__Robin_Dreeke_FBI_Interview.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 5:30am CDT

Dave Negri’s Secret Price Weapon

 Using “pricing” as a marketing strategy is often overlooked by entrepreneurs.  It may be a little scary, butsometimes all you need is a higher price point to become more attractive to your target market.   The affluent tend to associate higher prices with higher value.

When someone is looking for the “best” - choosing the cheapest person is not the path he or she will take.  When you are QUALITY-focused, slogans like “highest quality AND lowest price” don’t fit together.  They are actually mutually exclusive.  Clients recognize this and are extremely suspicious if you try to pair quality and low prices in your marketing.

 “Price Shoppers” exist at all income levels. A higher-income price shopper will be just as difficult and draining to work for as a lower-income price shopper.  The only difference is the higher-income price shopper has more expensive minimum and maximum price points, so you can spare the time and energy to accommodate him or her.

 It is critical for your own sanity, to filter out bargain price shoppers by having prices preset at higher levels.  Higher prices indicate to prospects you are concerned about quality rather than quick sales.  Immediately this creates a level of trust. When prospects respond favorably to your rates, they are seeking quality products—not low prices.  

For more information about Dave and his work visit: Www.contractorssecretweapon.com


Amy Cuddy – Non Verbal Link

I have already spoken at length about the necessity of positive mental programming and the initial steps one must take to put this powerful tool into practice. Great persuaders gain control over their destiny by controlling and directing their thoughts. Considering that our actions are emotion-driven, and our emotions are thought-driven, we've got to get our thoughts on track. They determine everything! You can always remind yourself of this powerful reality by keeping in mind the acronym TEA:

Thoughts → Emotions → Actions

Take an honest look at your life right now. Where do you find yourself? That place is the sum total of your thoughts over the course of a lifetime. Where have your thoughts taken you thus far? Where will they take you tomorrow, next week, or next year? It is only natural that negative thoughts will creep into your mind from time to time. As soon as they sneak in, escort them right back out. Don't entertain them. They are destructive. Some people use a rubber band to snap their wrist every time a negative thought comes into their mind. The pain associated with this technique fixes their negative thinking very rapidly. If you don’t want to try the rubber band, you can send me a $2,000 check every time you have a negative thought. I am sure that would start to work for you real fast, because that is what it is probably costing you! Your thoughts are what programs your subconscious mind.

Your thoughts are what program your subconscious mind. Your subconscious mind is the center of all your emotions. When your subconscious accepts an idea, it begins to execute it. And then your subconscious uses your ideas, knowledge, energy, and wisdom to find the solution. Now, it might occur in an instant, or it might take days, weeks, or even longer. Nevertheless, your mind will continue working on a solution. You need to understand that as you program your mind, you must ask yourself, "Do I program negative suggestions in my mind?" If you are telling yourself that you can't do it, you are right. When that inner voice tells you that you can't do something, it is important that you replace the thought or turn down the volume or intensity of the negative voice. Then you can change it to "I can do it," "I'm going to win," and "there's plenty for everybody." Altering your inner voice's perception is going to make a difference, and that's the important thing. That's because your subconscious mind will always accept what you program it to think. The bottom line is that you are what you think about, and you have the power to choose what you think. No one can do it for you. Great persuaders work on this mental training every day, while average persuaders think they have heard it all before and are doing OK.

If we are going to squash our negative thinking, we must replace those thoughts with new, positive ones. As you practice mental programming, new and inspiring ideas will intuitively and instinctively arise on their own. But give yourself specific goals and targets to keep your thoughts centered on—this type of focus will nurture and augment your newfound inner strength. Sure your logical mind will fight you on these new thoughts, but eventually your new programming will win. I love what Napoleon Hill, author of the classic Think and Grow Rich, had to say about this:

Direct download: Podcast_197_-_TEFAMA_How_The_Brain_Works.mp3
Category:general -- posted at: 5:00am CDT

Anthony Iannarino  -  Becoming The Trusted Advisor

 What Is Not Advice

 Your product is not advice. Nor is your service. Nor are the solutions that you happen to sell. The features, benefits, and advantages of what you sell are not advice either.

 Your management team isn’t advice, and as impressive as your board members may be, they aren’t advice. You know what else isn’t advice? All of your locations, and all of the logos of the big, recognizable, widely-admired companies you serve. As remarkable as your clients are, they are not advice.

Your differentiation strategy isn’t advice either. The things that make you different and make a difference for your clients may help you distinguish yourself in a crowded market, but they are not advice.

 If you are spending the precious little time you have with your dream clients talking about you, your product, your company, your clients, and what makes you different, you are not “advising.”

 What Is Advice

 What are all the forces weighing down on your dream client and causing them to produce results that are less than they should be? How should they be thinking about these forces, and what should they do about them?

 What are the risks of not responding to the systemic challenges that threaten your dream client’s business? What are their choices? What are the trade-offs? What are the risks of taking action now?

 What opportunities are available to your dream client now? Which provide them with the greatest advantages and which hAve the fastest return on invested time, money, and resources?

 How you engage with your dream client matters.

 Where you start the conversation is important because you are defining your relationship. If you begin the conversation with the things that you are comfortable talking about but that don’t create value, then you are not establishing that you have the potential to be their consigliere.

 If on the other hand, you start the conversation with strategically important issues, you demonstrate that you know something worth knowing, something that can benefit your dream client.

 Business acumen is the new sales acumen. What is at risk by starting the conversation too low is nothing less than your relevance.

To learn more about Anthony and his work please visit:  www.thesalesblog.com/newsletter

Direct download: Podcast_196_-_Anthony_Iannarino__-__Becoming_The_Trusted_Advisor.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 5:30am CDT

Negotiation Versus Persuasion

Let’s talk about where negotiation fits into the world of persuasion and the difference between the two. Persuasion occurs when your ideas are so convincing that the other party ends up adopting your point of view. With persuasion, there is no compromising as there is in negotiation. Rather, the other party willfully and enthusiastically abandons their position to embrace yours. This abandonment is not brought about by manipulation because the other party clearly sees the gains and advantages of doing business with you.

Negotiation, on the other hand, is a process of give and take. It’s being able to overcome objections on both sides of an issue and ultimately reaching some common ground. While persuasion is the ultimate ideal, anytime any one of us is presenting our ideas, the other party is often equally committed to their own convictions, thus making negotiation the next best path.

Often when we hear the word “negotiation,” we think of a complex deal going on in the business world. In reality, however, all of us are involved in multiple negotiation processes every day. For example, when you want steak but your spouse wants lasagna, you may banter back and forth about why one is better than the other. In the end, however, you end up going to a place that offers a bit of both. In that instance, you may not have thought of yourself as negotiating, but that’s really what it was. Negotiation is so common in day-to-day life that you must master the skills of great negotiators to become a Master Persuader.

 

Offer

Negotiation 3 day Bootcamp Audios

 

 

Article Link

https://www.apa.org/pubs/journals/releases/lhb-lhb0000189.pdf

https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/11780104

 

Direct download: Podcast_195_-_Lie_Detection_and_Human_Deception.mp3
Category:Business -- posted at: 5:00am CDT

This episode features guest Scott Ingram -

In this episode learn all about why mindset and belief in yourself is absolutely fundamental. And the tips and tricks in getting yourself there. And how to show your customers/prospects that you truly care. 

Kurt and Scott discuss how important it is to be constantly learning, absorbing and surrounding yourself with the best.

They also discussed how most top sales people are more than willing to talk you about their sales process and share the information that they’ve learned. People want to give back and know that they were once at the beginning too. 

Who is doing it the best in your organization/niche? Figure out what they are doing and do the same thing.

Scott points out the one of the most important things is understanding who you are, your unique strengths and what the unique value is that you bring to the way you sell, and do more of that. “

Play up those unique strengths and values and be a more authentic and magnified version of yourself.

Scott Ingram is the host of the Sales Success Stories podcast where he interviews top sales people. Not just high ranking sellers either, everyone Scott talks with on his show is #1. He's also an active sales professional himself.

I’m in sales, and I have always looked for ways to improve myself and achieve more but have been frustrated by the source of most of that content. Instead of hearing from “sales experts” who aren’t currently in sales (somebody selling themselves or some form of sales training doesn’t count); I want to learn from salespeople who are the best of the best. What are they doing to achieve more than anybody else

While this is a very selfish project for me to learn and improve myself, I hope that you can benefit as well. Please subscribe to the podcast, and I invite you to join our Sales Success Community where you’ll find a growing group of like-minded sales achievers.   

Listen to Link Discussed in the Show

Direct download: Podcast_194_-_Sales_Strategies_of_Top_Producers_Scott_Ingram.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 5:00am CDT

The Value of the Simple Statement

Simple is better than complex. Since we are unable to recapture or replay our spoken words, we hope that they will be correctly interpreted the first time they are heard. Unfortunately, spoken words can be the most misread and misinterpreted form of communication, and therefore, can be a great hindrance to effective persuasion. When you're in a persuasive situation, use simple, direct, and concise language, rather than fretting about how eloquent you're sounding. Persuaders normally try to speak to the lowest common denominator.  You might feel smarter using big words, but simple words are more persuasive.  Complex words will cause people to pretend to understand, but will not be persuaded.

 

Following are some simple guidelines to keep your speech and verbal packaging on the right track.

 

· Don't use technical language unless you are sure every member of your audience understands the meaning.

 

· Don't use profanity. In general, using profanity damages your credibility.  

 

· Be sensitive to whatever language your audience might find offensive or politically incorrect. 

 

· Speak in everyday language. You want your audience to relate to you and to feel as comfortable with you as possible.

 

· Use language that will make you seem familiar and easy to follow.

 

· Keep your language simple and clear.

 

· Keep your sentences short. Use as few words as possible unless you are painting the picture—just one idea at a time. 

 

· Use words that will engage the audience. Use "you," "we," and "us."

 

· Don't use vague and abstract words. They muddle your meaning and confuse your listener.

 

· Don't talk down to your listener by using pompous and pretentious words. 

 

· Use verb-driven language. By using verb-driven language, you will arouse a greater sense of action and motivation. Using action verbs will make your statement more convincing because your audience will engage their emotions, consciously and subconsciously. Verbs that are abstract or overused do not communicate excitement.

 

Attention-Grabbing Words  

With so many words in the English language to pick from, you must be very particular about which ones to use. Some will grab attention more than others. The following 21 words are commonly used to effectively persuade:

 

1.         Discover

2.         Guarantee 

3.         Now

4.         Improve

5.         Results

6.         Save

7.         Health

8.         Wealth

9.         Quick

10.       Easy

11.       Money

12.       Free

13.       Avoid

14.       New

15.       Benefit

16.       Proven

17.       Prevent

18.       Transform

19.       You/Your

20.       Eliminate

Article Link:  https://psychology.iresearchnet.com/social-psychology/social-psychology-theories/self-verification-theory/

Product Special

Magnetic Persuasion – Create Instant Influence

 

 

Direct download: Podcast_193_-_The_Art_of_Persuasive_Emails.mp3
Category:Business -- posted at: 5:00am CDT

What Does Improv Have To Do With Business? With guest Kelly Leonard from

www.secondcityworks.com

 

The ability to thrive amid change requires 4 things:

 

·         The ability to recognize where you are in any given moment

·         The flexibility to choose a new path

·         A willingness to collaborate on a solution

·         The freedom to take a risk…and to learn from failure

 

Great tenets for doing business, right? But these just happen to also be the very same skills we employ in our arena. Improvisation is an art form developed from a need to enhance assimilation, empathy and collaboration.  We didn’t seek out this connection–the findings found us, to say the least. To be honest, we’re kicking ourselves that we didn’t see it sooner.

 In fact, existing academic research and data already points to the power of improvisation. Here are a few of our favorite examples:

 

Divergent Thinking – “Improvisation encourages people to break away from set patterns of thinking.” –Carine Lewis, Peter J. Lovatt; University of Hertfordshire, UK

Negotiation – “Cooperative improvisation yielded more successful negotiations.” –Paul Ingram, William Duggan; Oxford Handbook of Critical Improvisation Studies

Decision Making – “Without improvisation, emergency management loses flexibility in the face of changing conditions.” –David Mendonca, Giampiero E.G. Beroggi, William A. Wallace; Rensselaer Polytechnic Institute

Problem Solving – “Improvisation shows us creativity in action. If shows that – in art, as in life – failures and mistakes can be turned into chances for original and unpredictable achievements.” –Alessandro Bertinetto, University of Udino

 

How do we achieve all this? With two little words that can change everything:

 Yes, and.

 That’s it! Our big secret. We teach that by understanding and applying the core improvisational concept  of “Yes, And,” you can pretty much achieve anything. In business–and in life–we are constantly tasked with making something out of nothing: new products, new clients, new strategies, new bosses, new co-workers, new economies.

 You can’t do new by saying no.

 And you can’t stop at yes.

What we’ve learned over more than half a century can bring out the creativity out in anyone. We can teach you and your team how to create an atmosphere that encourages risk taking and produces better understanding, real results and measurable success.

visit secondcityworks.com for more information!

Direct download: Podcast_192_-_Humor_Improv_and_Influence_-_Interview_-_Kelly_Leonard.mp3
Category:Business -- posted at: 5:00am CDT

This podcast is going to focus on how to handle the heckler and maintain audience control in any situation.  One of the key factors is getting to know your audience.

 

It is critical that you understand where your audience is coming from and what their needs and wants are. What do they really want to know? What are they searching for? What information can you present to bridge the gap between what they feel and what they want? It’s important to understand your audience as a general group and also to get inside their minds as individuals.

 

Here are some questions you should ask yourself about your audience as you prepare:

 

•     Who am I trying to persuade?

•     What is the common background or interest that brings them together?

•     Who are these people as individuals (business people, students, mothers, etc.)?

•     What can I offer that they will universally care about and understand?

•      What types of things will they be looking to get out of my message?

•      In terms of my key point(s), are they likely to agree, disagree, or be  

        indifferent?

•      Do I need to be aware of their political, religious, professional, or other

         associations?

•       What is their average education and/or income level?

•       What is their general age range?

•       Will they tend to be more conservative or more liberal in their life views?

•       Is this likely to be an easygoing or demanding crowd?

•       How long will I be likely to keep them engaged? How much time is available?

•       Is what I have to offer appropriate for this audience?

•       What is my audience’s biggest challenge and how am I going to solve it?

 

Article link:  http://www.cnn.com/2016/08/03/health/distracted-driving-addiction-brain-impact/index.html

Direct download: Podcast_191_-_Handle_the_Heckler__Audience__Control.mp3
Category:Business -- posted at: 7:00am CDT

Synchronized Beliefs

Very closely related to directing our thoughts are our beliefs or belief systems. Just as airplanes have guidance systems to direct them, so do we have systems guiding and shaping what we think, do, and believe. Without these influences, we will miss our intended destination, just like an airplane out of touch with the control tower would never be able to land.

 What if you had two control towers telling the pilots what to do? The results would be devastating. What many of us don't realize is that we are tuned in to multiple guidance systems simultaneously. For example, we value the input of our parents, spouse, and close friends, and pay heed to rules of the community, society, and often religion. Since so many influences may conflict with one another, we have to prioritize who or what dictates our belief system. If we cannot synchronize these influences, we will wander through life, always missing the target because of our inability to synchronize our beliefs. Great persuaders hit their targets more often because of a well-synchronized belief system.

 

It may be a very helpful exercise to pinpoint the main beliefs that are shaping your life and to determine whether or not any of them are in conflict with each other.

 

Consider the following possible conflicts of interest:

            The pursuit of wealth                      "Money is the root of all evil"

            Job security                                       Entrepreneurial freedom

            Making it to the top                         "Family comes first"

            Love of eating                                   Healthy body

            Adventurous                                    Ducks in a row

            You only live once                           Restraint, moderation

            More free time                                  Pursue financial independence

            Reduce debt                                      Start investing

            Successful business                         Successful parent

            Spiritual                                             Wealthy

 

After you have identified which beliefs shape your life, you need to determine which beliefs represent personal truths for you and which ones you have simply acquired by social and cultural osmosis. Upon closer study, we often find that much of what we believe has not come through our own thoughtful searching. Rather, it comes through imitating what society teaches is appropriate, and what we have been exposed to at home, school, or work. In order to truly change, grow, and prosper, we need to be consciously aware of the rules we've made for ourselves, where they have come from, and what they're based on. Do they all serve you? Or are they sabotaging you? It is time to take ownership of your beliefs.

 

Article Link

https://psychcentral.com/blog/archives/2017/01/07/these-9-mental-habits-suck-the-happiness-from-your-life/

Direct download: Podcast_190_-_Beliefs_that_Sabotage_Success.mp3
Category:Business -- posted at: 6:00am CDT

Jon Gordon's best-selling books and talks have inspired readers and audiences around the world. His principles have been put to the test by numerous NFL, NBA, MLB coaches and teams, Fortune 500 companies, school districts, hospitals and non-profits. He is the author of numerous best-selling books including The Energy Bus, The Carpenter, Training Camp, The Seed, You Win in the Locker Room First and The No Complaining Rule. Jon and his tips have been featured on The Today Show, CNN, CNBC, The Golf Channel, Fox and Friends and in numerous magazines and newspapers. His clients include The Los Angeles Dodgers, The Atlanta Falcons, Campbell Soup, Dell, Publix, Southwest Airlines, LA Clippers, Miami Heat, Pittsburgh Pirates, BB&T Bank, Clemson Football, Northwestern Mutual, Bayer, West Point Academy and more.

The Power of Positive Leadership

Great leaders understand that people drive the numbers, not the other way around; to win, you must win with people—and this book shows you how. It all begins with your decision to become a positive leader, and the understanding that leadership is not just about what you can do, but what you can inspire, encourage, and empower others to do. You'll learn to bring out the best in each of your employees by sharing the best within you; instead of running over people to achieve your goals, invite them on board—together, you can achieve more than you ever thought possible.

 Difficult times call for leaders who are up for the challenge. Results are the byproduct of your culture, teamwork, vision, talent, innovation, execution, and commitment; this book shows you how to bring it all together to become a powerfully positive leader.

 Discover the true drivers of short- and long-term success

Learn what leadership is really about

Cultivate the habits and outlook of successful leaders

Strengthen your people and let the results speak for themselves

Find the right people, invest in them, nurture them, and develop them; as they grow, so do you. The Power of Positive Leadership helps you become the person you want to be, and the leader your people need.

For more information about Jon and his work visit: www.jongordon.com

Direct download: Podcast_189_-_Leadership_Expert__Jon_Gordon.mp3
Category:Business -- posted at: 7:00am CDT

Charismatics have the ability to focus quickly in the moment similar to great athletes.  To master the area of focus and concentration, we must implement what athletes do before, during and after the competition.  

•           Visualize the win or the outcome before it happens

•           Constant self-discipline even when it hurts

•           Refocus after failure and learn from those mistakes

•           Instantly replace negative thoughts with positive ones

•           Have the ability to quickly change their state of mind

•           Able to concentrate during heavy distractions 

 

The key is to begin to focus and concentrate a little at a time.  Today try to focus and stay on a task for five minutes.  Where can you go?   What do you need to do to avoid distractions?  As you progress with this skill, add the length of time and your ability to limit distractions.  The second thing is to figure out what block of the day is your most productive time?  Is it the morning, the afternoon or the evening?  This is the time when you do your most important and difficult work.  Find that time when it is the easiest to concentrate and get things done.  When you truly master your ability to focus, not only is it easier to influence others, you will be able to accomplish ten times more in half the amount of time.

Link to Article: http://journals.sagepub.com/doi/abs/10.1177/107179190300900404

 


Many think that when they get into positions of leadership or prominence that others should be serving them or looking up to them.  This is great way to turn people off and decrease your ability to be charismatic.  If your only focus is on you, then eventually all then the focus will be off you.  Sure others might run to your attention, but they are doing it for money or recognition, they are not doing it because of who you are.  When you start to focus on others, show some kindness and offer goodwill, offer some charity, and the focus will return to you.  When you look for the good in others you become better yourself.  When you start looking for ways to serve, not only do you open the doors to influence, it increases your well being and your happiness.

 

You demonstrate goodwill by focusing on positives and being careful with the negatives.  Don’t be harsh or forceful when dealing with people.  Remember most people can be highly sensitive or feel overly vulnerable. (Remember esteem)  Watch your statements and your actions and always show that you have the audience’s best interest in mind.   Never criticize someone unless you really need to and do it the right way.  Criticism damages your relationship and destroys the connection you have with them and hurts your charisma.  Instead, find something positive and show goodwill.  This will increase acceptance and self-confidence.  Many times we correct or criticize in the wrong way and this destroys the possibility for leadership, loyalty and charisma.  Anytime someone feels stupid or you are perceived as inconsiderate and your ability to lead or influence diminishes.  Little do most people know that their comments cause rebellion and resentment.  Show you care, show some goodwill and you automatically will transfer charisma.

 

A big part of goodwill is the mindset of abundance.  Abundance is a state of mind that allows you to give knowing that the universe will reward you.  You don’t do it for the reward, you do it because it is the right thing to do.  As author Stephen Covey said "the abundance mentality (which) flows out of a deep inner sense of personal worth and security.  It is the paradigm that there is plenty out there and enough to spare for everybody.... It opens possibilities, options, alternatives, and creativity."  You know that when you give of your time, money or even skills that it is not only the right thing to do, it increases your abundance, your health and your happiness and your charisma.  Get past the scarcity mentality society has given you and see the abundance the world has to offer.  Realize we are all on the same human team and we all have different strengths and weaknesses.  Always be willing to share your strengths and someone will appear to help you with your weaknesses.

Article link:https://www.fastcompany.com/3035120/4-steps-to-overcoming-failure-and-using-it-to-your-advanta

 

Direct download: Podcast_187_-_Charisma_2_-_Empowering_Others__Contagious_Cooperation.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 1:04pm CDT

Passion is very contagious.  When you transfer this passion, the people around you start to radiate that passion.  They perform better, if it is at work, it is no longer work.  They become more proactive, more willing to work as a team and become more optimistic.  When you have tapped into this passion you become more determined and it increases your persistence.  It starts to become a burning desire and consumes you and it radiates to others.  A word of caution, just because you are passionate does not mean you can forego learning the skills you need to be successful.  It is a critical piece of the charisma pie, but you still need more pieces of the pie to radiate powerful long-term charisma.

More than anything else, passion recruits the hearts and minds of your audience.  Charismatics radiate heartfelt passion.  When the audience can sense your passion and sincere conviction for your cause, they will emotionally jump on board.  We all love people who are excited and filled with believable passion for their subject.  Passion is critical to influencing others and transmitting charisma.  When you have passion for something, you want to let everyone know about it.  You want to convert as many people to your cause as possible, and when someone disagrees with you, you are not swayed by their opinions or advice.  

PS

Remember to test out your personal pics.  The website we talked about was Photofeeler.com

 

Article Link: http://www.upi.com/Science_News/2017/04/14/Science-says-Let-a-stranger-pick-your-profile-picture/8781492196442/

Direct download: Podcast_186_-_Charisma_1__Presence__What_Do_You_Radiate.mp3
Category:Business -- posted at: 9:00am CDT

Rapport: The Instant Connection  

Rapport is the secret ingredient that makes us feel a harmonious link with someone else. It is equivalent to being on the same wavelength with the other person. Rapport is the key that makes mutual trust materialize.

Have you ever met a perfect stranger and just hit it off? Finding plenty to talk about, you almost felt as if you had met before. It just felt right. You could talk about practically anything and you lost track of time. You developed such a strong bond with that person that you knew what he was going to say. Everything just clicked between the two of you and you felt a connection with this person. You felt your ideas were in sync and you enjoyed your time with each other. This is rapport.

In our discussion of rapport, we are going to elaborate on these concepts: humor, body language, touch and mirroring. Mastering these skills will help you to develop rapport faster.

Humor  

Humor can be a powerful tool to create rapport. Humor makes the persuader seem more friendly and accepting. Humor helps gain attention, helps you create rapport, and makes your message more memorable. It can relieve tension, enhance relationships, and motivate people.  Appropriate use of humor increases trust in your audience.

Humor can also distract your audience from negative arguments or grab their attention if they are not listening.  Humor diverts attention away from the negative context of a message, thereby interfering with the ability of listeners to carefully scrutinize it or engage in counterarguments. If listeners are laughing at the jokes, they may pay less attention to the content of a message. Humor can "soften up" or disarm listeners.  Humor connects you with your audience and increases their attention to your message.

 Humor must be used cautiously, however. If used inappropriately, it can be offensive and may cause your audience to turn against you. Humor should only be used as a pleasant, but moderate distraction. As a rule of thumb, if you are generally not good at telling jokes, don't attempt it. Be sure that you have good material. Nonfunny humor is not only ineffective, but irritating. Modify your humor so that it is appropriate for your audience.   

Smile

Another aspect of humor is the smile.  A smile is free, generates a great first impression, and shows happiness, acceptance, and confidence. Your smile shows that you are pleased to be where you are, or happy to meet this person. As a result, they become more interested in meeting you. Smiling also conveys a feeling of acceptance, which makes your listener more trusting of you. It has been shown that sales representatives who smiled during the sales process increased their success rate by 20 percent. However, as with traditional humor, use a smile appropriately.

Direct download: Podcast_185_-_Likeability_and_Charm_Create_Charisma.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 11:40am CDT

Similarity: Similar Is Familiar

Similarity theory states that familiar objects are more liked than less familiar ones. The same holds true with people: We like people who are similar to us. This theory seems to hold true whether the commonality is in the area of opinions, personality traits, background, or lifestyle.  

I can remember walking in a foreign country, taking in the unfamiliar sights and sounds, and then running into someone from my own country. We could have been from opposites sides of the nation with nothing in common, but there was an instantaneous bond between us, all because we had something in common in a mutually unfamiliar place.   

Similarity is also true even in the judicial system. If jurors feel that they share some common ground with you and, better yet, like you—even subconsciously—for that similarity, then you will have a markedly better chance of winning your case. Anytime we establish something about ourselves that others will identify with, we increase our persuasive powers. In one particular study, antiwar demonstrators were more inclined to sign petitions of those similarly dressed, and often didn't even bother to read the petition before signing!   Numerous studies conclude that your audience is most responsive to individuals who dress and act similar to them.

Researchers McCroskey, Richmond, and Daly say there are four parts to similarity: attitude, morality, background, and appearance.  Of the four similarity factors, attitudes and morals are always the most important.  Power Persuaders are always looking for similarities or common beliefs to form the basis of common foundations with their prospects. We want to be persuaded by those who are like us and with whom we can relate. 

We see real-world examples of this in advertisements. We want to see people we can identify with, and the advertising execs accommodate us. When we see a particular commercial, we think, "Hey, he is just like me! He is also Broke!  That couple has a messy, cluttered house, too." We see ads showing the average Joe or Jill because they create that similarity.   

Your audience will connect with you when they perceive the similarity.  O'Keefe found two important points regarding similarity and persuasion. First, the similarity must be relevant to the subject or issue being persuaded. Second, to persuade someone, the similarities must involve positive rather than negative qualities.   The bottom line is we are interpersonally connected to others when they possess similar values and beliefs.

Direct download: Podcast_184_-_Create_An_Instant_Connect_With_Anyone.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 10:00am CDT

Emotional States: Understanding Feelings and Moods

Charismatic people know there is a fine line between logic and emotion.  To influence someone you have to have both.  Emotion will override logic every time.  I am going to assume here (I know I shouldn’t do that) you have the ability to form a logical argument.  Emotion is the missing piece for most people that want to become more charismatic.  Very few really know how emotional states, feelings, subconscious triggers and moods affect other people and affect (good and bad) your ability to maintain charisma and influence.  

 Logic tends to be more temporary while emotion will carry your message into the future.  Emotion inspires us to take action, but logic justifies those actions.  We know it is difficult for most people to distinguish between logic and emotion.  We know that is difficult to identify many of the emotions that are felt throughout a day.  We know people can’t forecast what emotions they will feel, how long they will feel it and how strong the emotion will be.  Most people just sense if you or your message makes them feel good or feel bad.  Your goal is to change or maintain their emotional state or mood.

These are the emotions that will detract from your charisma and decrease your ability to influence.

 Anger

Anger is a sign that something is out of line.   Anger is also known as a secondary emotion.  What they are angry about and really angry about are usually two different things.  You can help decrease a person’s anger by finding out the main reason they are upset.  It is also useful to ask for their help, opinions, or advice.  This will usually diffuse their anger or even help change their demeanor.  Sometimes the person doing the influencing may want to use anger to make a certain point or to evoke a certain reaction.

 Worry

When someone is worried or preoccupied with something occurring now or could happen in the future, your ability to change their mood or influence them declines.  Worry could cause you to feel nervous, uneasy or anxious.  Worry can be referred to as a negative vision of the future.  Help them by bringing them back to reality.  Worry will subside when you can substitute their negative images with positive ones.  Another way worry decline is when you help them make a decision.  Worry decreases with decisions.

 Fear

Fear is anxiety or tension caused by danger or apprehension.  The possibility of harm can be real, but it is usually an overactive imagination.  Fear motivates us and moves us away from perceived unpleasant circumstances or certain danger.  Logic rarely reduces fear.  The key to understanding fear is to realize that is has been learned from a past experience.  Remember that fear is very real to them.  Make sure when they are in fear that you can provide a solution for them.  Then your job as a great influencer is to help them feel capable of overcoming this fear. 

Direct download: Podcast_183_-_Emotional_Hijacking.mp3
Category:Business -- posted at: 10:00am CDT

That first thirty seconds with your audience are critical. How do you start? Great persuaders craft and design their message. There is no room to wing it. Your opening is where your audience formulates and settles into their impressions of you. Think of your opening or introduction as comprising no more than 10 percent of your full presentation. Budgeting your speech in this manner forces you to organize your time so that you know exactly what you’re going to say and how you’re going to say it. 

 As you move from the opening of your presentation to the main body, it is helpful to remember the acronym TESS, which stands for testimonials, examples, statistics, and stories. Top persuaders tend to incorporate each of these elements into their presentations. Our research shows that when speaking to an audience, each point of TESS will resonate with different audience members. On average, TESS resonates as follows:

Testimonials                12%

Examples                     23%

Statistics                      18%

Stories                         47%

          

       Testimonials. A testimonial is a person’s statement or declaration of what they believe and assert to be true. In your presentation, it can be your own, or it can come from a third party. Testimonials are a source of social validation—people assume that if others believe in it, then they should too. Great persuaders know how to use testimonials when their credibility is low. Make sure your testimonials are believable and unbiased and that they are qualified for your audience. 

            Examples. An example is an explanation or model that demonstrates or illustrates your point. Instead of just spouting off facts, examples make your points come alive. Examples reinforce your ideas and make them vivid and real in the mind of your audience. Examples can be taken from research studies, from articles you’ve read—and they can be personal anecdotes. 

           Statistics. In a consumer climate that is increasingly skeptical, I recommend using statistics sparingly. Everyone knows that you can “cook the books” and find statistics to prove almost anything; your audience wants credible statistics. Statistics resonate with the logical mind, and when convincing, they are very persuasive. In particular, the analytical minds in your audience will love you and want to know the source. Most statistics need to be explained and often work best with visual aids.

            Stories. The most powerful of the four elements of TESS are stories. They draw your audience in while helping them understand and appreciate your message. I’m sure you can think of a time when you were in an audience, not paying much attention to the speaker. You were probably off in your own world, when all of a sudden, you perked up and started to listen because the speaker started telling a story. When we hear a story, we automatically tune in and want to know what happens next.

Direct download: Podcast_182_-_Perfect_Persuasive_Presentation_Part_2.mp3
Category:Business -- posted at: 8:00am CDT

Structuring Persuasive Presentations

Why should we be concerned with the structure of a persuasive presentation? Top predictor of professional success is how much you enjoy and how good you are at public speaking.   Studies also show the ability to give presentations was ranked as the most critical skill needed to move up in today’s business environment.

 

Before we jump into the meat of this topic, remember as you prepare your persuasive message that you want to focus on one defined issue. You are not there to persuade on ten different points. Stay focused and steer clear of sensitive issues that aren't on your original agenda. In other words, don't inadvertently offend your audience on one issue when your focus in on another. The structure of your persuasive message should follow the pattern discussed below.

 

  1. Create Interest

You have to generate an interest about your chosen topic. Your audience needs a reason to listen: Why should they care? What's in it for them? How can you help them? A message that starts with a really good reason to listen will grab the attention of the audience, enabling you to continue with the message. Without this attention, there is no hope of getting your message across.

 

  1. State the Problem

You must clearly define the problem you are trying to solve. The best pattern for a persuasive presentation is to find a problem and relate how it affects the audience. In this way, you show them a problem they have and why it is of concern to them. Why is this a problem to your audience?  

 

  1. Offer Evidence

This is the support you give to your argument. Evidence validates your claims and offers proof that your argument is correct. It allows your audience to rely on other sources besides you. Evidence can include examples, statistics, testimonies, analogies, and any other supporting material used to enhance the integrity and congruency of your message.

 

  1. Present a Solution

You have gained your audience's interest and provided evidence in support of your message; now you must solve their problem. You present the argument you want them to believe and satisfy the need you have identified or created. You have created dissonance and now you are providing the solution. How can your product meet their needs and wants and help them achieve their goals?

 

  1. Call to Action

A persuasive message is not true persuasion if your audience does not know exactly what they need to do. Be specific and precise. In order to complete the solution to their problem, they must take action. This is the climax, the peak of your logic and emotion. The prescribed actions must be feasible. Make your call to action as easy as possible.

 

Using this type of structure facilitates people's acceptance of your message and clarifies what you want them to do. We all have a logical side to our mind, which results in our need for order and arrangement. If we don't sense some sort of structure, we tend to become confused. If you can't be clear, concise, and orderly, your prospect will find someone else who is.

 

Link to Article: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/25811633

Direct download: Podcast_181_-_Perfect_Persuasive_Presentation.mp3
Category:Business -- posted at: 8:00am CDT

Paul Smith (Author) - Lead with a story and Sell with a story

 Leadwithastory.com

 Storytelling has come of age in the business world. Today, many of the most successful companies use storytelling as a leadership tool. At Nike, all senior executives are designated "corporate storytellers." 3M banned bullet points years ago and replaced them with a process of writing "strategic narratives." Procter & Gamble hired Hollywood directors to teach its executives storytelling techniques. Some forward-thinking business schools have even added storytelling courses to their management curriculum.

 The reason for this is simple: Stories have the ability to engage an audience the way logic and bullet points alone never could. Whether you are trying to communicate a vision, sell an idea, or inspire commitment, storytelling is a powerful business tool that can mean the difference between mediocre results and phenomenal success.

 Whether in a speech or a memo, communicated to one person or a thousand, storytelling is an essential skill for success.  

 

Paul Smith 

Paul Smith is one of the world’s leading experts on organizational storytelling. He’s a keynote speaker, storytelling coach, and author of the books Sell with a Story, Parenting with a Story, and the bestseller Lead with a Story already in its 8th printing and available in 6 language around the world. Paul is also a former consultant at Accenture and former executive and 20-year veteran of The Procter and Gamble Company.

Direct download: Podcast_180_-_Engage_and_Persuade_with_Stories_-Paul_Smith_Interview.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 8:00am CDT

 Six stats on the importance of trust in influencer marketing

 “Only 22% of brands are trusted.” (Havas Media)

 That’s a frightening metric for any marketer. Without establishing trust between your brand and your audience, it’s nearly impossible to market your product or service. So marketers are faced with the difficult question of how to create and maintain trust with their audience.

 “61% of women said they won’t engage with an influencer’s sponsored content if it doesn’t feel genuine.” (Bloglovin)

 Trust and authenticity are critical for engagement in any influencer campaign. Without trust, the content that you’re hoping will build engagement won’t feel genuine and won’t resonate with your desired audience.

 Low trust equals low engagement, and a pattern of this can erode an influencer’s audience over time. While this report references women specifically, these principles are applicable across the influencer marketing sphere.

 “43% of millennials rank authenticity over content when consuming news.” (Forbes)

 According to a survey of 1,300 millennials carried out by Forbes, young people prioritise trusting a company or news site before they will look at any content it produces. As Dan Schawbel of Forbes wrote, “Millennials connect best with people over logos.”

 If trust isn’t established, millennials may not even interact with your content. An influencer can get a lot of attention, but the only attention that matters for your brand is authentic, genuine interaction that builds trust between you and the audience.

 “60% of YouTube subscribers say they would follow advice on what to buy from their favourite YouTube creator over a traditional celebrity.” (TheYouTube Generation Study)

 Celebrity spokespeople have long been considered a surefire way to build positive associations for your brand among your target audience. H&R Block wants to establish trust with their audience, so they recruit Jon Hamm to be their spokesman.

 But savvy brands are turning to influencers on YouTube and other channels who have built audiences related to a shared set of interests. These placements are more authentic, and drive more brand-relevant recommendations than the generalized appeal of celebrity spots.

 “83% of consumers trust recommendations from their peers over advertising.” (Nielsen)

 Consumers take recommendations from their peers much more favorably than the ‘recommendations’ they see in ads. They trust the opinions of their friends because they know they’re both unbiased and providing recommendations that are personalized to the individual. Influencers fit this bill nicely.

 The best influencers turn down deals that don’t have a natural fit in their feed and approach branded deals without bias. Either they already love a product and are happy to endorse it, or they agree to test the product and give an honest review or endorsement.

 If you find the right influencers whose personas fit your brand values, targeted to your area of interest, the recommendations they share are more personalized for their audiences.

 “54% of consumers believe the smaller the community, the bigger the influence.” (Technorati)

 Although influencer marketing can help you reach a larger audience, ultimately, that audience doesn’t matter if it’s not the right audience. It is more valuable to show your brand to 30K likely buyers than it is to show it off to 200K totally uninterested viewers.

 Finding influencers whose content and style perfectly match your brand, no matter their follower level, is a much smarter strategy than just getting as many eyes as possible. Influencers with smaller followings may have a more relevant, engaged and trusting audience because they haven’t “blown up” yet. Check the comment sections on a Kardashian-branded post and you’ll see what I mean.

 To build trust with your audience, you don’t need to reinvent the wheel. But you do need to foster trust between your brand and the influencer — trusting them to make content that will capture your brand values while also engaging their followers in the best way.

 You can take advantage of existing marketing principles to build a playbook to engage your audience. Make use of peer recommendations from authentic influencers to drive engagement with your brand.

 Brian Zuercher is CEO & Founder of SEEN, and a contributor to Search Engine Watch.

Direct download: Podcast_179_-_New_Trust_Research_and_Interview_with_Michele_Plunkett.mp3
Category:Business -- posted at: 9:00am CDT

Proxemics: The Science of Space

              The anthropologist Edward T. Hall created the science of proxemics, which studies how people use, react to, configure, and occupy the space around them. We all want our own space, and we feel uncomfortable when people violate our personal territory. While it may sound overly obvious, research shows that many persuaders get too familiar, too fast. Disrespect for your audience’s personal space—especially when you are first meeting them—will definitely not build rapport. Many persuaders don’t even know that they are violating their audience’s space. They may think, for example, that by reaching out and touching their audience members on the arm, they will be seen as warm and extending. Such as gesture may really be a turnoff, though. What does it feel like? Imagine that you go to a movie theatre and there are 150 seats but only ten people watching the movie. Social custom calls for everyone to spread out. Let’s say you take your seat and the nearest person is twenty feet away. How would you feel if a stranger came and sat down right next to you in this theatre of empty seats? That would be a violation of your personal space. 

                   Understanding proxemics requires an understanding of territory and the role of dominance. The bigger office, the armrest on the airplane, the larger chair, sitting at the head of the conference table, getting into someone’s face—all these things have hidden meanings. It could be unwanted touching or jumping into a conversation that damages likeability and rapport. Be observant. How is your use of space perceived by your audience? Always err on the side of giving extra space, instead of too little. 

            Does the science of proxemics really matter? The distance you keep or don’t keep when persuading someone communicates a message. Great persuaders understand rapport and interpersonal communication, and they respect personal space. You will find that the amount of space between a person and a persuader affects the way they are able to interact with each other and what message their interaction sends. When we sit at a table or across from a desk, we each draw invisible lines of our perceived personal space. When these invisible territorial lines are violated, tension is created. We all have regions or areas where we permit others to enter or prevent others from entering. Great persuaders recognize when an invitation to enter their audience’s private zone is being extended.

            Your audience’s intimate area is not to be violated by you, the persuader. In North America, that area extends from your audience’s face out to about twenty-four inches. Most social interaction takes place between four and twelve feet of distance. This personal space preference not only varies by individual but also by culture. For example, in the Middle East or Latin America, it is reduced by almost 50 percent.37 In Germany, on the other hand, the space is larger. It is comedic to watch two people from two different cultures trying to communicate. One is violating the other’s personal space, while the other is backing up in an attempt to regain his personal space. The two are in some sort of dance to maintain and regain comfortable communication space.

Article:http://captology.stanford.edu/wp-content/uploads/2015/02/RSA-The-new-rules-of-persuasion.pdf

Direct download: Podcast_178_-_How_Proxemics_Creates_Resistance.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 2:00pm CDT

The Law of Obligation and Marketing

We often see this method at work when companies give out complimentary calendars, business pens, T-shirts, or mugs.  This specialty advertising is an $18.5 billion dollar industry.  It not only creates obligation, but keeps your name in front of your future customer.  The studies show that 52% of people given a promotional product said they were more likely to do business with the person that gave them the item.    

The same principle applies when you go to the grocery store and see those alluring sample tables. It is hard to take a free sample and then walk away without at least pretending to be interested in the product. Some individuals, as a means of appeasing their indebtedness, have learned to take the sample and walk off without making eye contact. The studies show that 70% will try the sample when asked and 37% of those will buy the product.   Although some have taken so many samples, they no longer feel an obligation to buy or even pretend they're interested in the products anymore. Still, the technique works, so well that it has been expanded to furniture and audio/video stores, which offer free pizza, hot dogs, and soft drinks to get you into the store and create instant obligation.

Pre-giving is effective because it makes us feel like we have to return the favor. Greenburg said this feeling of discomfort is created because the favor threatens our independence.   The more indebted we feel, the more motivated we are to eliminate the debt. An interesting report from the Disabled American Veterans Organization revealed that their usual 18 percent donation response rate nearly doubled when the mailing included a small, free gift.

A men’s clothing store offers free pressing for suits bought in their store. This creates a sense of obligation among their customers, who when they next decide to buy another suit are more likely to buy it from the store that offered the freebie.  Offering a free inspection or free estimate also will create obligation.  Remember this does not guarantee they will do business with you.  They will be more willing to listen and puts you higher on the list.

An interesting side effect to obligation is what is does to the giver.  Those that help you or give you something feel more positive and have higher self-esteem.   The other bonus is that the giver also feels more committed to the recipient. Which means always let them reciprocate back to you.

Link to article: http://www.sciencedirect.com/science/article/pii/0022103171900254


How You Can Tell If You’re Really Connecting

              I’ve talked about common rapport-building obstacles and how you can know for sure that you’re not connecting. But how do you know that you are connecting, especially when your audience is not going to tell you? One of the most obvious signs of a good connection is that the initial defensiveness and skepticism begin to dissipate. The mood relaxes and your audience begins to relax. They begin to voluntarily offer personal thoughts and feelings without you having to pull it out of them. Openness increases, and resistance decreases. There is more eye contact and more open body language. It could best be summed up by saying things start to “feel right.” The exchange is natural, sincere, positive, and upbeat. You could compare it to how you feel when talking to a good friend. 

 

                   One of the myths about having rapport with people is that you have to agree with each other on every point. Rapport and agreement are not the same. When you have good rapport you will no doubt agree on many things, but this is incidental and not essential. Your ability to connect with people cannot be conditional. To be a powerful persuader, your persuasiveness cannot have any contingencies. You must be persuasive no matter who comes to your table, and that means accepting people as they are and still respecting them, listening to them, and caring about them. Some may think I go too far in saying agreement is incidental. Is it possible to have rapport with someone with whom you agree on nothing? Think of your friends and family. You can probably think of someone you like and connect with very well even though you don’t agree on financial, political, or religious matters.

Direct download: Podcast_176_-__Create_Interest_and_Intrigue_With_Your_VBC.mp3
Category:Business -- posted at: 10:16am CDT

Energy of Influence

      Another way to enhance your ability to motivate yourself and others is to make sure all things are balanced in your life. Great persuaders lead a balanced life and keep everything in perspective. I call this delicate balance “life alignment.” Make sure there is balance in every aspect of your life. Imbalance can undermine motivation and cause inaction and unhappiness. Many times, we quit early because of imbalance, even when we don’t realize an imbalance exists. It may be only one area of our life that is out of whack, but it can still have a direct effect on other areas of our life. Just as in a mutual fund, where one bad stock can pull down the fund’s overall value, one bad area in your life can also have a disproportionate negative effect. 

            Ask yourself these questions: Would I invest in my own mutual fund of myself? Would I suggest that my family or friends invest in me? These are hard questions to ask, but the answers to them are necessary as you get your life on track. Take a look at the stocks in which you have invested in your own life. What stock is pulling the rest of your portfolio down? Are you a growing mutual fund or is your mutual fund losing money? Is your fund stagnant? If you won’t invest in your personal mutual fund (yourself), who will? 

            When we look at life, we have to realize that it is not lived in segments, but rather, it is part of a greater whole. Every aspect of your life will either help or hurt the rest of your life. Our aim is to get all aspects working together to create a high-performing fund. Realize, however, that you can invest too much in one aspect of your life. When you do, you can get unbalanced just like a tire on a car. Even too much of a good thing can lead to disaster. 

            As you invest in yourself, you must make sure you are diversifying in the following six areas: We often spend too much of our time spinning our wheels and investing in stock that has no value or that is diminishing the value of our mutual fund. We get so busy buying the stock society recommends that we forget to examine whether this stock is helping or hurting us. There may also be times when you need to sell a stock (change a habit or belief) because it is not performing. We always need to make sure that we are a growth fund and that we are continually investing the right things in ourselves. If we neglect any one of the life-alignment areas, our overall happiness and success will diminish.

link to article: 

http://psychcentral.com/news/2016/05/02/evidence-found-for-visual-stereotyping/102596.html

Direct download: Podcast_175_-__The_Energy_of_Influence.mp3
Category:Business -- posted at: 5:48pm CDT

The Law of Obligation, also known as pre-giving or reciprocity, states that when others do something for us, we feel a strong need, or urge, to return the favor. Returning the favor rids us of the obligation created by the first good deed. The adage "one good turn deserves another" is a part of social conditioning in every culture. And, even beyond that, the maxim serves as an ethical code that does not necessarily need to be taught, but nevertheless is understood. For example, when someone smiles or gives us a compliment, we feel a great need to return the smile or compliment. Even when these gestures are unsolicited, we feel a sense of urgency to repay the person who has created the mental or psychological debt. In some cases, our need to subconsciously repay this debt is so overwhelming that we end up dramatically exceeding the original favor. The reciprocity trigger created by the car salesman's water is a classic example of this principle. Most of us keep a mental scorecard of these favors.

 

The drive to alleviate feelings of obligation is so powerful that it can make us bend toward people we don't even know. Accepting gifts or favors without attempting to return them is universally viewed as selfish, greedy, and heartless. It is often strictly due to this internal and external pressure that people conform to the rule of reciprocity. One university professor chose names at random from a telephone directory, and then sent these complete strangers his Christmas cards. Holiday cards addressed to him came pouring back, all from people who did not know him and, for that matter, who had never even heard of him.  I had a student raise his hand at a seminar and said, I know him and he is still getting Christmas cards from strangers over 20 years later.  Can you believe people have sent out Christmas cards all these years to someone they didn’t even know?

 

 

Article:  http://psych.colorado.edu/~vanboven/teaching/p7536_heurbias/p7536_readings/kruger_dunning.pdf

Direct download: Podcast_174_-__Getting_Past_The_Gatekeeper.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 7:30pm CDT

Smells: The Aroma of Persuasion

We all know what the smell of movie popcorn does to us. Smell is directly linked to our emotions.  Our sense of smell is so powerful that it can quickly trigger associations with memories and emotions. Our olfactory system is a primitive sense that is wired directly to the center of our brain. By four to six weeks, infants can tell the difference between their own mother's scent and that of a stranger.  Almost everyone has experienced situations in which a smell evoked a nostalgic (or not so nostalgic) memory. Think of the smells that take you back to your childhood. For some it is the smell of fresh baked bread, or freshly cut grass, or of the neighborhood swimming pool. You can go back twenty years in a matter of seconds with the sense of smell. Smells require little mental effort to be experienced and the subconscious reaction happens with little conscious attention.

 

There have been numerous studies conducted on the impact scent and fragrances have on association. A study conducted among undergraduate students found that female students wearing perfume were rated as more attractive by male students.  Scents were even found to improve scores on job evaluations. Of course, offensive odors can also be used (and have been used) to evoke a negative response. This technique was once used while campaign committees were rating and appraising political slogans. Not surprisingly offensive odors caused the ratings for the slogans to go down.  The smell of citrus Windex helped people to be more generous with their money and time towards the habitat of humanity.  Cleaning aromas also help more people be honest and fair and their dealings with others.

Article Link

 http://healthland.time.com/2013/12/16/my-nose-made-me-buy-it-how-retailers-use-smell-and-other-tricks-to-get-you-to-spend-spend-spend/

Direct download: Podcast_173_-__How_Aroma_Can_Help_or_Hurt_Influence.mp3
Category:nlp -- posted at: 7:13pm CDT

Summary:

Talking Too Much 

  Being an extrovert, having the gift of gab, or being able to make small talk with anyone you meet can definitely be used to your advantage, but watch yourself. How can you persuade if you are always talking? It will be very annoying to your audience if they sense that you like hearing yourself talk more than listening to their concerns. Remember, it's about them, not you. Great persuaders listen more than they talk. In fact, great persuaders use their listening and questioning skills to get their audience to persuade themselves. 

 

Often when someone comes to you, she already knows what she wants. She already has something in mind. She just needs to talk through it with someone. Which approach do you think will have better, longer-term results: you persuading your audience, or you helping them persuade themselves? It's much better if your audience feels as if they have made the decision themselves, without perceived external influences. When you do have to talk, be succinct and to the point. A good rule of thumb is not to talk more than 30 percent of the time. 

 

Now, with these general guidelines in place, it is worth pointing out that you must always be prepared to adapt and adjust to the personality type of your audience. For some people, talking 30 percent of the time will still be too much. Discussing only what is relevant to the matter at hand and keeping chit-chat to a minimum is best for these no-nonsense types. Your attempts at being their buddy will likely annoy and maybe even offend them. Some people feel that being overly warm and personable is not appropriate when you have just met someone for the very first time. Polite and professional, yes, but warm and fuzzy, no. The bottom line is, don't get too friendly too fast.

Link to article: http://foodpsychology.cornell.edu/discoveries/curse-chinese-buffet

Direct download: Podcast_172_-_4_Power_Skills_of_Persuasion.mp3
Category:Business -- posted at: 8:14pm CDT

Today I interviewed Dr. Stephanie Burroughs.  She is the author of Dating Your Business Prospect.  She looks at networking in a whole new light.  She calls it 360 networking.  She explains how to use social media and expanding you social media with face to face and belly to belly networking.  She will answer the following questions on the Maximize Your Influence Podcast

 

How to you prepare for this encounter with an important prospect?

How do you approach them without looking like a fool?

What does the perfect follow-up look like?

 

Stephanie Burroughs Bio

Dr. Stephanie D. Burroughs, President of StephanieSpeaking LLC began her minority business advocacy in 1980, while working in the construction industry providing contract compliance monitoring for M/W/DBE programs. She later increased her competencies by providing program development, project management and diversity certification auditing services. 

 

StephanieSpeaking LLC provides speaking, workshop facilitation and business navigation services for minority, women, veteran, and small business owners. The company helps business owners overcome fear, confusion and stagnation by providing clear instruction and easily integrated strategies on how to successfully navigate and compete for government and public contracts. Dr. Burroughs is known for her inspirational, holistic and common sense approach resulting in many clients and audience members experiencing thought-life transformation; thereby changing their outlook and approach to their business and life endeavors.

 

Dr. Stephanie D. Burroughs is a graduate of Rutgers University and currently resides in New Jersey.

Direct download: Podcast_171_-_Networking_with_Stephanie_Burroughs.mp3
Category:PodCasts -- posted at: 6:58pm CDT

The New Year is here and your influence skills are more critical than ever.  You have heard enough about goals – so let’s focus on those persuasion tools.  Does your eye contact help you influence or does it trigger deception cues?  Are you reading your prospect’s eyes to adjust your presentation?  Let’s find out the power of your eyes.

 

Ralph Waldo Emerson said, "The eyes of men converse as much as their tongues." The more common phrase we hear is "the eyes are the windows to the soul." Through our eyes, we can gauge the truthfulness, attitude, and feelings of a speaker. Not making the proper amount of eye contact can have devastating results. Our pupils are one of the most sensitive and complicated parts of our body. They react to light, but they also respond to our emotions, revealing a variety of feelings.   

Making eye contact can also convey love or passion. In a number of studies on eye contact and attraction, researchers found that simply looking into one another's eyes can create passionate feelings. In one particular case, two members of the opposite sex who were complete strangers were found to have amorous feelings toward each other after merely gazing into one another's eyes.   In another study, beggars were interviewed about their "tactics" for getting donations. Several of the beggars stated that one of the very first things they tried to do was establish eye contact. They claimed that making eye contact made it harder for people to pretend they hadn't seen them, to ignore them, or to just keep walking.  Other studies have shown that public speakers who make more eye contact, use pleasant facial expressions, and incorporate appropriate gestures into their speeches have more persuasive power than speakers who do not.

What do we need to know about the eyes?

Sunglasses – Hide the eyes and arouse distrust

Avoidance of eye contact – Lack of confidence

Less than 50% eye contact - Insincere and distant

Increased eye contact – Starting to accommodate or acceptance

Rapid blinking – Resistance to what has been done or said

Extended eye contact – Anger, love or frustration

Pupils dilate – Interested, and receptive

 

Direct download: Podcast_170_-_Eye_Contact_Deception_or_Influence.mp3
Category:sales -- posted at: 5:20pm CDT

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